As long as I've been on the dizziness/vertigo board (1995)--and in the chat room, I've always hesitated to say how long I've been "a dizzy," because I felt there was no way I could be of any encouragement. Hopefully, I can now give hope to even the worst of you! This may be long, but well worth reading.

As most of you know, I am 65 and have had Meniere's, Tinnitus and BPPV for 40 long years. (Doctors believe a gas explosion accident, while
pregnant, damaged my inner ear.) Actually, I had escaped Tinnitus until about 3 years ago. Hearing, forty years alone is frightening for any newbie to
hear, right? I questioned, "Should I even tell anyone or not? But how else could they relate? If only it wasn't 40 years, but it was, I couldn't lie."

During the first 12 years of this torture, I went through 2 divorces and was a single Mom of 6. No family- - none at all. No money, no help and so dizzy each day that I literally had to spend days at a time in bed, room spinning. On rare occasion, there were 2 sisters who lived in the next block that came
to help me with the kids. Through them is how I met Hank, my knight in shining armor and we married in 1967.



We could not take vacations, because, "what if"? So we bought a RV and that's been my security blanket all these years. I could always lie down when
I had to, so it enabled us to have some sort of life away from home, plus the kids loved it.



After all those years of living with first Meniere's and BPPV while vacationing one year, I had a spell away from home. The inevitable had happened. I had a bad spell in Florida (1992-I think) and had to ride home, in bed, in the motor home for 12 long, grueling hours. This resulted in Mal de Debarquement; thus be being bed ridden for 3 years. There's very little I remember during this time.



During these years and up till now, Hank was left to do absolutely everything. We had to hire a lady to stay with me during the days and the only time I got up was to walk to the bathroom. Some days were not as good, so I had to use the bedpan. Not only did Hank take full care of me, the house, the motor home, yard, cars, he worked a full time job which many
times, included overtime. Need I say, Hank is my God sent angel and my very
best friend?



It was about a year after this, when my eyes could focus well enough to
handle a computer, that Hank bought me a laptop so I could use it laying
down. I had lost all touch with the outside world and I needed to get back
to some sort of reality. I remember very little about those years.



We both began reading all we could get our hands on about vertigo and dizziness. That's when I found the dizzy/vertigo chat room and Randy.



Anything and everything on vestibular disorders, we have on file. Many years
before this bad spell, we'd done all we knew. I'd taken everything they
suggested, but nothing made a significant or lasting change. We'd talked to many doctors, audiologists and each one may have helped a little, but nothing
stopped Meniere's from rearing it's ugly head. And BPPV was with me 24/7.

Before the attack in Florida, I had taken Yoga each week for 4 years and can honestly say it helped me. It was my way of a non-invasive PT and it worked
for me. I had also gotten acupuncture each week for 4 years and it definitely kept me upright and I realize I went downhill once I stopped both. (We moved
away from the Dr. and I wouldn't just to anyone.) Be VERY CHOOSY when it comes to picking an acupuncturist. Only go to a licensed doctor who is
certified to give acupuncture. By the way, it should not hurt either.

I was working for a chiropractor at this time and had to sneak in the rest room and lay down on the floor till I could hopefully get the woozies to stop. It got so bad that I could no longer work or drive. That was in 1989, I think. My dates may be a little off, but I'm trying. Just so you get the idea of how my life has been, that's the purpose in me writing all this.

I've had so many bad weeks, months in the past 40 years, that I thought I'd never get any better and had really accepted that this was my life forever.
Living like this is very depressing, so I asked to go on an antidepressant. I was having to battle thoughts of suicide during constant bouts of vertigo.

I am a firm believer in God and prayer, and if God didn't heal me, then I decided I'd be content in whatever situation I was in. (Philippians
4:11.) I'd just go with the flow and stop getting so upset. Crying only caused terrific long lasting TMJ pain.

On a rare day when I could handle seeing my kids or my pastor, (my only visitors) they'd have to sit in my bedroom because I could not get up. The bedroom was our "everything" room. My prayer was to just be able to sit/lay in the living room-- or walk out on the patio. I'm talking YEARS here, not just a few days here and there.

In later years, I'd get up and "maybe" be able to stay up 10 minutes or so, but never sitting or just standing. I couldn't do either of those. I had to
be moving, but oh so slowly.



Going back 10 years ago when things started getting worse (I did have times of reprieve), I lost all my friends. I was a very active woman and unless I
was having a bad week or day, I was out every day doing things I loved to do. We also moved about 25 miles away, but friends stopped coming around long
before we moved. Once I could no longer do things, like go to church, shopping or out to lunch, I saw them less and less. That hurts. That's about
what my life consisted of for over 10 years or more.

I could not ride in the car, or really sit up, so when I started a support group it was right here in my living room. That's been over 2 years now.

Oh, did I say we bought a Pontoon (we live on a lake) and I've been taking almost daily cruises, all summer? We even get in the water on our rafts and
it doesn't bother me one bit and get this- - -I survived an almost drowning! I won't go into our stupidity that caused an almost tragedy, but I was able to stay afloat and not drown. Amazing is not the word.